So I have recently tried online dating and joined a popular site. I got a lot of messages but everyone loved my profile and laughed. I don’t think it is funny but apparently everyone else did…I am not feeling too good so here is my profile and that is the end of that
I am super high energy, I like to think it’s because I am awesome and fabulous, but it may be in part due to my ADHD. Pish posh apple sauce. I do not take life very seriously and tend to view the glass as half full well actually over flowing. I am pretty optimistic and hopeful in most situations, even when odds are against me. But for some odd reason, things ALWAYS work out in my favor. You might be able to tell I am super goofy and silly. My friends say I have a quirky sense of humor, once again I just say fabulous. I am excited about life. Like really excited. I am just really happy to be alive and am told on a weekly basis (by complete strangers nonetheless) I radiate “love/energy/hope/optimism/positivity/etc.”. Thanks, but I am just doing my own thing. I dance when I hear music I like, yes this may be in a pet store or while driving. I am very forward and blunt. There are no games or hidden messages about me, you will know explicitly if I like or dislike something either by facial expression or verbal expression. So yeah, I have a zero tolerance for bs. You want to go play in the mud, go do that on your own terms, I am a woman and like to have my stuff together so go have fun with bs. I hate being ignored. Go tell me to peck off if you don’t want to talk to me…lack of social interaction is actually considered inhumane and cruel punishment- look under the Geneva Convention code.
Ok so you probably want to know some real potatoes and not these grits…I am originally from Philly but moved to Boston last year for my MPH (go health policy and management! !! And shout out to pharmaceuticals! !!). My undergraduate degree was from a small liberal arts college in PA in psychobiology and statistics. Umm I am pretty driven and focused in school and strive my best. In between degrees I worked as a scientist and engineer for major pharma doing downstream protein purification. ..and no I was not a tech. Right now I spend my days being fabulous and doing policy type of work. Interns and grad students run healthcare btw…so don’t hate Obama hate us. But hey, antimicrobial resistance can only be fought so well by untrained grad students.
I am pretty independent. If you’re a gold digger, don’t holla for a dolla (thanks Honey Boo Boo). I want primarily cartoons and documentaries. I really enjoy reading. I am physically active although may not look it (I’ve a natural hour glass figure, sorry I will never be thin and look like a banana). I have braces currently because well being a public health gal, my bite was off and my molars needed to be realigned. So if you don’t like brace faces, go floss your teeth and go away.
My obese black cat, Olivia, means the world to me. One man talked crap about her. Seriously, if you’re this insane go check into a hospital or demand assisted outpatient therapy for MA (one of the 6 states that don’t have AOT). Or go get a hug you miserable person.
I wear my heart on my sleeve. I love attention and affection. I give it and like it in return. Chilvary is NOT dead, heck go check out Parker Croft’s film “Falling Overnight”. Please be in shape kr like healthy looking. O and flossing is a must. Poor hygiene is absolutely repulsive. And someone who is not a play boy and looking for commitment. And no racists please. Or psychos. Or dependent men. Or stage 5 clingers. Just be real and not a flake o bake. No one likes Corn Flakes and they’ve been around longer than you–so no one will like you if you’re one. O and please be like 25-35ish. I am not looking for a sugar daddy or some older man. I am sure you’re great, but I do not want to tea bag it.
K thanks folks. Remember: stay classy
O and I travel a lot and speak Italian. I know some French and German and a few Greek words.
Quindi, è molto piacere. Ciao ciao!
My first dates have ranged anywhere from the Eiffel Tower to grabbing milkshakes and watching cartoons to hiking to no first date and just making out. Meaning I am pretty open except I am putting off the sex tjing till I fall in love. Makeouts on first dates happen no more.
O and fat people and those who do not floss are the biggest turn off ever. I can’t deal with them. Go ahead judge me, I judged you.
The few military men I have dated have all turned out to be grade A psychos-full of themselves, arrogant, uneducated, selfish, very opinionated and accusatory, and just all around horrible people. This site has only confirmed my past experiences. So if you’re in the military or were, please feel to prove me wrong. And no I am not against it, I applied for a position withing my field to work for the Marines. I also own a gun and can shoot. So munch on that…let’s go to the range. Now that’s a first date.